Month: May 2017

For A Good Time, Call… A Movie Pitch for Full Moon Features @RealCharlesBand

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For A Good Time, Call… A Movie Pitch for Full Moon Features As promised for my 2nd annual Full Moon Features celebration, a new month of Full Moon reviews & articles, and a brand new movie pitch as well! Hello to Charles Band and to all of the fine creative individuals at Full Moon Features, as well as my amazing readers (that’s you!). My name is Packy Smith, and I have been working on a new movie pitch for Full Moon Features this month. First and foremost, I would like to thank…

Trancers III: The Nerfed Llamas Review @fullmoonhorror @RealCharlesBand

Packy - Head Llama

Trancers III: The Nerfed Llamas Review – Deth Lives! Sometimes you just want to watch a film that you know that you are going to love, and so that is exactly what I did. The Trancers series has long been a Full Moon Features favorite of mine, and Trancers III: Deth Lives is no exception. For background on my love for the series, read my reviews of Trancers, Trancers: City of Lost Angels, and Trancers II. Needless to say, I’m a huge Trancers geek and finding an excuse to watch…

Vengeance of the Dead: The Nerfed Llamas Review @fullmoonhorror

Packy - Head Llama

Vengeance of the Dead: The Nerfed Llamas Review – Wherein We Discuss Sleepwalking, Possessions, and Why Shouldn’t Trust Grandpa Alone in the Basement. I’m reviewing Vengeance of the Dead today as a special request. It is a rare occasion, but I do get some solid feedback from my readers and even some special requests. I couldn’t have been more thrilled to get the request. It came at a rather advantageous time, as I had no idea which Full Moon movie to watch next. So, instead of stabbing in the dark…

Vampire Resurrection: The Nerfed Llamas Review @fullmoonhorror @RealCharlesBand

Packy - Head Llama

Vampire Resurrection: The Nerfed Llamas Review – Have you seen my boom mic recently? Selecting a new movie to review can be a finicky process. Sometimes it is as simple as “Ooh, that looks interesting, I should watch that!” A lot of the times though, it’s more like “There’s way too many movies to pick from. It’s gonna take forever to find the right one.” Multiple factors go into deciding which Full Moon movie that I watch, not the least of which being the mood I’m in. Sometimes I’m wide…

Crash and Burn: The Nerfed Llamas Review @fullmoonhorror @RealCharlesBand

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Crash and Burn: The Nerfed Llamas Review – Wherein we answer the difficult question of whether or not human prostitutes are better in the sack than synthetic ones… I had fun dabbling in the post 2000 catalog of Full Moon Features. I was even surprised by how much fun Ravenwolf Towers was (read the review here) and horror psychologically twisty Deathbed was (read the review here). It was great to experience the newer generation of Full Moon content, but I was ready to crisscross back to another classic film. Preferably something…

Deathbed: The Nerfed Llamas Review @fullmoonhorror @RealCharlesBand

Packy - Head Llama

Deathbed: The Nerfed Llamas Review – Psycho Sexual Frustration: the Movie! After my review of Ravenwolf Towers: Episode 1 “Bad Mary” (which you can read here) kept me on the plus side of Full Moon Features from after the year 2000, I though it would be a good idea to stay there and find a new title that I had never seen before. I’m very well versed in Full Moon classics from 80’s and 90’s, but I haven’t seen as many of their modern films. Dedicating a month to watching…

The Totally True(ish) Story of How Tim Thomerson Seduced My Girlfriend

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The Totally True(ish) Story of How Tim Thomerson Seduced My Girlfriend The year was 1999 and my girlfriend, we’ll call her Kitty (because pretty much everyone else does in real life), were attending Project A-Kon in Dallas, TX. There were a number of reasons that we went to the convention: we love anime, comics, sci-fi & fantasy media, and to hang out with like-minded people that were as nerdy as we were. However, I had another agenda on top of these goals… I was going to procure an autograph from…

Mass Effect Andromeda – Nerfed Llamas Review @masseffect

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Mass Effect Andromeda – Nerfed Llamas Review – “Pathfinder, you have new email at your terminal…” There are not many people that love the Mass Effect franchise more than I do. Equally, without a doubt… but not more. Certainly, there are folks who have gotten tattoos, created elaborate cosplay, written fan fiction, and are generally more involved in the fandom aspect than I am, but even still I would wager that they do not love the franchise (lore, characters, etc.) more than I do. To put things into perspective, let…

Ravenwolf Towers: Episode 1 – Bad Mary: the Nerfed Llamas Review @fullmoonhorror @RealCharlesBand

Packy - Head Llama

Ravenwolf Towers: Episode 1 – Bad Mary: the Nerfed Llamas Review – Strange things are afoot at this ol’ famous Hollywood stomping grounds… I’ve been diving pretty deep into the classic Full Moon Features catalog for my coverage this month. Given my age and upbringing, this makes a lot of sense. The vast majority of established memories of Full Moon movies come from the bygone days of VHS rentals. To that end, I’ve reviewed Oblivion (1994), The Pit and the Pendulum (1991), Cinderella (1977), Creepozoids (1987), and Spellcaster (1987) so…

Spellcaster: the Nerfed Llamas Review @fullmoonhorror @RealCharlesBand @adamaofficial

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Spellcaster: the Nerfed Llamas Review – Don’t tread on an Ant, you’ll end up black and blue… On occasion, rare though they may be, the depth of the Full Moon Features catalog holds a hidden treasure that until I see it, I didn’t even know it existed. I know the usual suspects: Trancers, Puppet Master, Evil Bong, Subspecies, etc., and I’ve traveled off the beaten path enough to see Head of the Family, Bad Channels, The Dead Want Women, and many more oddities… but it wasn’t until I scrolled through…